An Uncomfortable Pleasure? Yes...

When Speaking Your Truth Feels Harder Than Living It

February 16, 2026

Today I had the pleasure of spending time with the version of myself who is still learning how to speak my magic in mainstream language.

I am sharing this uncomfortable truth because I feel many of you out there can likely relate in your own way. I had a brief interview this morning with a local radio station. My interviewer - a person I know, trust and enjoy - asked some questions about my work and shared some information about my upcoming fundraising event for the Potsdam Humane Society.

As I was asked about my work, I found myself going blank - words escaped me!

The version of myself who DOES this work feels comfortable, natural, and whole. When I go into a session with clients, it is easy to simply allow myself to go into receiving mode and begin channeling. Connecting with Source Energy is so inherent to who I am that it is effortless and incredibly enjoyable. My passion and purpose align as I am in service to others, fulfilling what I was put here to do and be for them and for the world.

The version of myself who DECLARES this work feels vulnerable and unsafe. I experienced first hand in early childhood, the fear and stigma attached when explaining to others that I connect with and hear their Loved Ones who are no longer with us on this plane.

Doing my work and declaring my work trigger two different nervous system experiences and the latter version is yelling, “Warning, Warning! Danger. Exposure! People might think you are strange, they may be afraid of you, Claire. And who do you think you are to proclaim something so outlandish?"

And so my system pulls the plug on my words.

Not because I don’t know what it is I do but because somewhere, long ago, visibility didn’t feel safe for me - or even allowed.

For many of us, our visibility doesn't feel safe because of who we are, what we do or don't do, what we believe, who we Love, where we come from, what we look like, what we can't do, what we can, and MORE by the expectations that were placed upon us as children by our parents, family groups, care takers, peers, educators, mentors, and spiritual teachers.

Our awareness of our own visibility insecurities are key to regulating the innate fear we are all born with. In ancient times, survival was dependent on the group, and group acceptance guaranteed a better chance at survival. This is instinct - a program installed for survival.

To become visible is to dare to be authentically you, to shine your own Light upon the world for others benefit, to make mistakes, learn from them, and grow into a better version of yourself through your experiences.

For many of us, the fear of making a mistake causes our nervous systems to think, "This is evaluation and evaluation historically means scrutiny, acceptability and ultimately, safety and survival." THIS IS A CONDITIONED RESPONSE that triggers our instinct for survival!

However, perfection does not build connection nor does it allow us to shine our Light in all directions. It merely creates a limiting box that warns us not to step outside for fear we may be unsafe in some way should we make a mistake and actually be HUMAN.

Authenticity requires us to dare to be disliked, even unloved by some. It dares us to do the hard things, the uncomfortable things. Authenticity dares us to be imperfect and allow others to SEE us being imperfect. It dares us to try new things and live as fully as we dare to dream.

I have found the practice of looking with perspective helpful for my own nervous system when it is triggered. For many of us on this planet today, the reality of becoming more authentic and risking being imperfect no longer means we must fear being left alone in nature, rejected by our tribe, or stoned in a village square. Our survival is not actually at risk most of the time. Our nervous systems just haven't downloaded the "Living in 2026" update yet. For better or worse, science may someday find a way to remove instincts but until that time, the instinct to survive through acceptance will likely continue to be the case for all humans for quite a long time.

So when I say that I had the PLEASURE of spending time with the version of myself who is still learning how to speak my magic in mainstream language, I mean it. Because it is stretching me beyond my current programming. I was uncomfortable but I dared to be wrong, misunderstood, disliked, feared, seen as weird or unholy, and imperfect to others.

I dared myself to show up for a cause that means a lot to me, allow the triggers to be felt, push through, and survive being perceived as imperfect publicly.

When we dare to find that strength within and allow ourselves to be authentic, real, and imperfect, we GET TO experience the great pleasure of shining our one of a kind Light for others who need it.

When we dare… we GET TO shine.

“The Pandas, the Soap, and the Truth”

One Medium’s Journey from Doubt to Trust in the Messages That Arrive Before Their Meaning

March, 20, 2026

Early in my career as a medium, there were times when I would be left a bit shaken after a session. I have always preferred to know as little as possible about a person before they come to sit with me, allowing the information that comes through to stand on its own; clear, specific, and unmistakably beyond anything I could have known.

Occasionally, I would be sitting with a client, and a few details coming through wouldn’t land with them. Either the client didn’t recognize the specific information their Loved One was providing, or it simply made no sense at all. When this happened, I would feel awful that I wasn’t able to provide “the right” information -even though later in that same session, they would hear from their people and pets loud and clear.

For whatever reason, there seemed to be this “alternate noise” that didn’t fit.

To me, it felt like failure. I felt like a failure.

I have always taken this important, healing work very seriously. I have witnessed the peace that comes over people after they’ve heard from their Loved Ones; knowing they are indeed okay, receiving details, advice, encouragement, and appreciation from beyond this plane. Once you’ve experienced how meaningful these messages are, how deeply they can affect someone’s well-being, you don’t want to get even one word wrong.

As time went on and my practice deepened, I learned to gently set the mystery information to the side and wait for the next piece of identifiable evidence to come through, doing my best not to be bothered by the fact that some of it felt “off the mark.”

Many times, those clients would reach out later - sometimes weeks, months, even years after their session, to tell me they had finally put the pieces together. Or that a family member had listened to the recording and immediately knew who that information belonged to.

But at the time, that still wasn’t enough to stop me from feeling awful about it. I could be...who am I trying to kid? I can be quite hard on myself.

And so I continued, quietly carrying the idea that sometimes “nonsense” just comes through. It seemed possible, after all, we are working within a world we understand so little about. Eventually, I made a sort of peace with it. I accepted that there would be moments I didn’t understand, and that my role was not to have all the answers, but to trust the process. If something was important, it would make sense when it was meant to, whether to my client or someone connected to them.

A few years ago, I had a particularly challenging session with a client (who has given me permission to share this).

As we sat together, the first messages from a gentleman with a strong German accent kept coming through. He was deeply apologetic and spoke in what felt like riddles, offering pieces of information that made no sense to my client. And yet, at the same time, he was able to describe people currently in my client’s life with remarkable accuracy.

The confusion was understandable. Both of my client’s parents were alive, so for this man to identify himself as family -specifically as a father figure, felt incredibly strange.

Eventually, we agreed to gently set the German man aside and focus on others who wished to come through. My client had come for a more recent loss, unbeknownst to me, and soon enough his beloved horse stepped forward with messages of comfort and appreciation. This was followed by his best childhood friend, and then a cherished family dog.

My client left feeling relieved, comforted, and deeply grateful to have connected with those he had been hoping to hear from.

And yet, despite the success of the session, I was left rattled. I couldn’t shake the mystery of the German man and why, once again, information that seemed so out of place had come through.

It bothered me so much that, later in the shower where communication often begins for me before a session, I turned to my Guides and my Loved Ones in spirit. I asked them to show me why this happens… why information that appears to make no sense sometimes comes through so strongly.

Two days later, I received a voicemail from my client, excitedly shouting,

“PLEASE CALL ME AS SOON AS YOU CAN! I HAVE SOME WILD NEWS ABOUT THE GERMAN MAN!”

I called him back immediately. He was laughing, crying, and shouting all at once:

“WE WERE TALKING TO MY BIOLOGICAL FATHER! MY BIO-DAD! I’M ADOPTED—I NEVER KNEW!”

After his session, he had called his mother to share the messages from his horse, his friend, and the family dog. He also mentioned the strange German man who had claimed to be family… a father figure who somehow knew details about his wife, children, parents, and even a recent destination vacation they had all taken together.

That’s when his mother told him the truth.

He had been born to a German immigrant. His biological mother had passed shortly after childbirth, and his father, young, grieving, and newly settled in a foreign country, made the heartbreaking decision to place him for adoption.

My client was happy to finally know the truth. He had had suspicions that there was more to know about himself and everything was now out in the open. He said his mom was relieved as well as his parents hadn't known how to approach it so long after this sensitive information should have come out. The healing process finally began for all of them.

In that moment as my client was telling me this, everything began to change for me as well. What I had once labeled as “noise,” “missed,” or “not landing” revealed itself to be something far more meaningful - pieces of a truth not yet known, but no less real. I began to understand that my role is not to filter or force understanding in the moment, but to honor what comes through with trust and integrity. Because sometimes, the messages that make the least sense in the moment are the very ones that carry the deepest truth, arriving exactly when they are meant to, in ways we could never have predicted.

And then, just recently, it happened again at the group reading in February 2026 – Messages of Love From Beyond.

At the beginning of the group session, I shared something a bit unusual. Perfectly drawn letters and a number had appeared in the soap suds while I was showering that morning, as I prepared for the evening. I had no idea what they meant, only that they felt important enough to pass along. At the time, no one in the room recognized them. And so, as I have learned to do, I let them go.

Later in the session, images of bamboo, and then a grandfather figure who identified as a war veteran came through. He showed me a small child, who I assumed was a granddaughter, and then suddenly I was surrounded by pandas. Not just one or two, but an overwhelming sense of panda everything… as if I were standing in the middle of a collection. It felt specific. Intentional. Meant for someone.

And yet… no one claimed him. So again, I released the message.

After the session, I received an email. One of the attendees shared that while it hadn’t made sense in the moment, they now knew who had tried to come through. The “panda child” I had seen was her husband who, as a boy, had collected panda items. His grandfather, a veteran, had been the one stepping forward. And their home holds some of those very pieces of his childhood, those same pandas that had filled my awareness so vividly.

And the letters and numbers from the soap that morning?

Soon after the session, I received word that they, too, found their place.

Very early in my career, I began recording sessions for my clients. At the time, it simply felt like the right thing to do for people. Now, I understand why it mattered so much. Those messages don’t get lost… they get recovered. Revisited. Re-understood, often at exactly the moment they are meant to be.

Moments like these no longer unsettle me in the way they once did. Instead, they remind me of something far greater than my own understanding. That not everything is meant to be recognized in the moment. That not everything is meant to be interpreted, organized, or make sense of right away.

Because sometimes, what feels like confusion is actually precision.

What feels like “noise” to me are memories waiting to be remembered by those who are meant to remember them. And what appears to miss the mark is simply arriving ahead of its time.

I have learned to trust that what comes through does so for a reason, whether it is understood immediately, or unfolds days, months, or even years later - and IT DOES!

More often than not, it is in those very moments, the ones that seem the most uncertain, where the truth is quietly, unmistakably waiting to be discovered.

Let's talk about Visitation Dreams!

Have you ever been visited by Loved Ones who have crossed over in your dreams? Ever wonder if your Loved One was really actually there visiting you? People, pets, spirit guides, family members from generations back are all able to visit you in your dreams if you are open to it. There are a few ways to tell the difference between regular dreams and Visitation Dreams.

But first, HOW?

In the dream state, our minds are in the least state of resistance to receive messages. In the waking hours, we may choose to overlook symbols that represent our deceased Loved Ones or we may just be too busy living life to even notice. We may dismiss a bright, lone cardinal at the bird feeder surrounded by a bunch of grey birds because, well...birds flock to feeders, right? That song on the radio that your grandmother Loved so much coming on just as you are passing the last restaurant the two of you went to before she crossed over...hmmm, just a mere coincidence? Or is it?

In the dream state, our minds are open, uncluttered and far less likely to dismiss the messages our Loved Ones are sending to us. The veil between spirit and physical world is less complicated by physical life, more fluid and thin making connection, communication and reception easier for both parties.

So how do you know if you have had an actual Visitation Dream?

• You FEEL good! You feel Loved, comforted, held and/or peaceful during the dream and upon waking.

Regular dreams can leave us feeling confused, entertained like watching a movie, off balance, like we have gone on an adventure, scared or curiously wanting to know more behind the meaning.

• Your Loved Ones will also directly interact with you; you may have conversations, share a hug, they may even simply look directly at you and smile. Sometimes they may have messages or just want to spend some time with you. Many times there is a good sense of humor shared between you in your interaction or happiness and joy.

In regular dreams, they will not appear so clearly, interaction will not be direct, you may not see their face or feel their presence. There will be a more mechanical feeling to the dream rather than one of familiarity.

• Visitation Dreams often appear and feel very real, sometimes there is a divine light energy that you can see around your Loved One or in the general setting of the dream. Sometimes there is a special glow to everything. Maybe it is a particularly sunny day as you visit. Your Loved One is visiting using Divine Energy or Light to visit you and often that can be seen incorporated somewhere into the dream.

Ultimately, upon waking after a Visitation Dream with a Loved One, we often feel happy and Loved and our day ahead seems that much brighter!

Who has visited you in your dreams?